Jeff Wallach » Blog

Tell Hotel General Manager You Won’t Be Paying Any Resort Fees

Jeff Wallach — Wed, 17 Nov 2010 00:57:17 +0000

Let’s say you’re at a coffee shop and you’ve just ordered a double latte. The price on the menu board says $3.95. You know

Let's say you're at a coffee shop and you've just ordered a double latte. The price on the menu board says $3.95. You know there's 6% tax. Then the barista taking your order says, "That'll be $7.50." As you reach into your wallet for a ten-spot you think to ask, "How did we get to $7.50. I thought the price was $3.95?" "That's the cream and sugar and plastic spoon charge," the barista explains. "But I'm not going to ...

Putting the Cart Before the Hors d’ oeuvres

Jeff Wallach — Fri, 13 Aug 2010 21:59:05 +0000

When I was a kid, possibly the best thing that could ever happen was that we’d go to MacDonald’s– which didn’t even have a

When I was a kid, possibly the best thing that could ever happen was that we'd go to MacDonald's-- which didn't even have a drive-thru window in those days-- and order dinner and go back outside and eat it in the car. As an adult, even on the longest road trips, I wouldn't ever consider eating in the car, except in one situation: if, for example, it were raining (and when isn't it?) in Portland, ...

Choosing The Right Club

Jeff Wallach — Fri, 19 Feb 2010 05:02:40 +0000

For my Father, Sidney Wallach, June 11, 1925-February 9, 2010. I’m in the garage of my parents pink house in Delray Beach, Florida, among the

For my Father, Sidney Wallach, June 11, 1925-February 9, 2010. I’m in the garage of my parents pink house in Delray Beach, Florida, among the recycling bins and the stacks of Costco toilet paper and the ancient sports gear, including a tennis racket that hasn’t been hit in two decades, trying to choose the right golf club for a challenging situation. But each time I pull a club out of the old standing bag in the ...

Smoke It Off The Tee

Jeff Wallach — Fri, 05 Feb 2010 00:19:39 +0000

This came to me via email today– if you love cigars and golf check it out . . . And for more on great cigars, see my story En Fuego in the

This came to me via email today-- if you love cigars and golf check it out . . . And for more on great cigars, see my story En Fuego in the Lifestyles section, under golf . . . Open to golfers worldwide, the Second Annual Montecristo Cup and Esencia Cup golf tournament takes place from April 22 -24, 2010 at the Varadero Golf Club - the island's only international course in Varadero - Cuba 's no.1 holiday destination. ...

Rest the Meat, Don’t Shock the Fish or Fear the Chicken

Jeff Wallach — Thu, 14 Jan 2010 05:39:54 +0000

24 Things I Learned at Sur La Table’s Cooking Classes This week my wife, Renee, and I have been enrolled in the introductory Kitchen

24 Things I Learned at Sur La Table's Cooking Classes This week my wife, Renee, and I have been enrolled in the introductory Kitchen Essentials class at Sur La Table here in Portland, Oregon. I know what you're thinking-- that this was a vaguely camouflaged way of ensuring a week of good lunches for myself, but I'm here to tell you that there's absolutely nothing wrong with a week of good lunches. Many thanks to Sur ...

A Catan-tonic State

Jeff Wallach — Sat, 12 Dec 2009 18:46:55 +0000

There’s no question that I’m way too old for this, but since my wife Renee and I have no children (just a talking cat named Mr. Boot),

There's no question that I'm way too old for this, but since my wife Renee and I have no children (just a talking cat named Mr. Boot), we do have a little extra time on our hands--time to read thick novels, work in the garden, write fiction, finish a project around the house, travel, take cooking classes, and pursue about a hundred other interests that most people would kill to have the time for. So ...

The Cranky Traveler: 10 Ways You Can Make My Flight More Enjoyable

admin — Thu, 19 Nov 2009 00:51:41 +0000

1. Show some courtesy. And cogency. If you think of my seat back like a trebuchet, and my head like the projectile you’d be shooting

1. Show some courtesy. And cogency. If you think of my seat back like a trebuchet, and my head like the projectile you'd be shooting with said trebuchet, every time you pull on my seat back with all your weight to lift yourself up to shuffle useless crap in and out of your too-large bag in the overhead rack, you snap my head forward at a high rate of speed. You have a seat ...

Visiting the Books

Jeff Wallach — Wed, 21 Oct 2009 23:38:06 +0000

For an author there is only one thing sadder than showing up for a reading on a book tour and finding that only the bookstore employee on duty

For an author there is only one thing sadder than showing up for a reading on a book tour and finding that only the bookstore employee on duty ventured out to hear you-- and he had to be there. Tonight-- on the first dark, monsoonish day of winter in Portland-- I began this season of hunkering with a visit to Powell's Books to replenish the bedside stack that will get me through the early-dark nights. I ...

Shanks for the Memories

Jeff Wallach — Thu, 08 Oct 2009 23:16:14 +0000

This is what the shanks are like: you are a healthy, fit, athletic fifty-year-old man who still plays many sports competitively. One morning you

[caption id="attachment_493" align="aligncenter" width="690" caption="Kapalua Golf Academy"] [/caption] This is what the shanks are like: you are a healthy, fit, athletic fifty-year-old man who still plays many sports competitively. One morning you wake up and go down to the kitchen for breakfast, and on your way back up to the bathroom you realize that you just cannot remember how to correctly climb the stairs. There’s nothing wrong with you—no cognitive meltdown, no physical infirmity. Your legs work ...

That’s Why I’m Here: September 23, 2009

Jeff Wallach — Wed, 23 Sep 2009 22:32:01 +0000

I’m not sure that anyone starts out as a youngster thinking to themselves: I want to grow up to be a GOLF writer! And that’s

I'm not sure that anyone starts out as a youngster thinking to themselves: I want to grow up to be a GOLF writer! And that's certainly not how I envisioned my career unfolding when I was eleven or twelve and determined that being a writer was possibly cooler, even, than being the Flash or the Green Lantern, because despite their super powers how would those guys perform in a Scrabble death match, anyway? When I ...